Chronicles of a Lizard Nobody by Patrick Ness

Zeke, a “Lizard Nobody” in his own opinion (as well as an actual lizard) learns to stand up for himself in this hilarious and heartfelt tale.

Chronicles of a Lizard Nobody by Patrick Ness, illustrated by Tim Miller. Walker Books (Candlewick), 2024, 199 pages.

Reading Level: Middle Grades, ages 8-10

Recommended for: ages 7-11

It’s no wonder that Zeke and his friends Daniel and Alicia are appointed hall monitors by Principal Wombat. “This isn’t because you’re monitor lizards,” she says, but of course it is. To Zeke, the appointment is just asking for trouble—who wants to run around screaming at students about their hall pass? He would prefer to keep a low profile like always, but that’s easier said than done because he’s at least twice the size as his fellow monitors. And he has personal issues such as the death of his father and the sadness of his mother and fact that the country of France has lodged on his knee as the result of an ancestral curse (just roll with it for now, reader).

Hall-monitorship brings him in closer contact with Pelicarnassus, the school bully who struts around in his little hat, accompanied by two egrets who both happen to be named Norman. An insult from Pelicarnassus leads to an instinctive punch from Zeke, which Pelicarnassus feels honor-bound to escalate, in spite of Principal Wombat’s efforts to have them shake hands and make up. Sometimes force must be met with force, even though Zeke feels he doesn’t stand a chance. But his friends believe in him (besides pointing out the obvious fact that Zeke is bigger than his rival), and friends will help him stand up to Pelicarnassus’ truly evil plan.

Patrick Ness is best known for dark dystopian tales like the Chaos Walking trilogy and A Monster Calls. This is his first excursion into middle-grade humor, and it’s laugh-out-loud funny in its understated wordplay and wild imaginings (like knee-sized France). There’s a subtle undercurrent of genuine sadness, though, in the person of Zeke’s mother, whose depression is personified by a black dog who comes to stay and growls whenever Zeke comes near. The intervention of a responsible, caring adult helps resolve that situation, bringing Zeke’s story to a sweet and satisfying end. Though there’s another chronicle to come . . .

Considerations

• Much is made of Principal Wombat’s “armored butt.” I guess this is a thing with wombats.
• Zeke’s friend Daniel has two moms, who are mentioned twice but don’t appear in the story. This is a thing with our current culture.

Bottom Line: A zany tale with genuinely sympathetic characters

Also at Redeemed Reader:

• Review: Cress Watercress is another animal tale with relatable characters, humor and heart.
• Reviews: Fly on the Wall and Pie in the Sky, both by Remy Lai, feature less-than-confident characters (both missing fathers) who stumble into growing up.
• Reflection: See Betsy’s post about Absent Fathers in Children’s Literature. 

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